So, I’ve been gone. I know. It’s been a tough month. High school here starts in 10th grade, so I’m soon done with my first year of it! Only two more years after that! Anyhow, I’ve been trying to still post but I do admit I haven’t had much time to read and I have been skipping weekly memes. I did however write a post about book tattoos, if you wanna check that out (Bookish Ink – Hypothetical Ideas for Theoretical Tattoos (Brought to You By a 16 Year Old With Underdeveloped Decision Making Skills and An Extreme Fear of Needles). I’m also late on this meme (hosted by The Broke and the Bookish) one but we’re gonna pretend I’m not.
So, it’s finally here. FREEBIE DAY. And of course I have no ideas. Let’s go browsing!
Okay, so I browsed. And then I thought of my own topic – yay!
I’ll probably end up writing a whole post about this subject one day because it’s one of my biggest… passions? Not sure that’s the right word, but I really do have a very strong
hate dislike for these movies. They usually completely butcher a wonderful book and I spend the rest of my life hating them. So this is going to be a list of book based films I hate / don’t plan on watching ever because I’ll probably hate them.
Book Based Films I Hate
- My Sister’s Keeper / Jodi Picoult, Directed by Nick Cassavetes – this book will ALWAYS lead this list. In fact, back when Facebook still had Groups, back in 2010, I opened one called “Nick Cassavetes directed My Sisters Keeper based on what book exactly??!.” God, I hate that film. It turned a beautiful story into a soppy sad cancer kid story, which “cliched” an amazing story about a girl who stands up for herself and faces a world that’s been treating her unfairly. The movie made Anna out to be a cruel sister who hates her family, whereas in the book Anna and Kate are friends. The movie puts the focus on Kate even though the main character is Anna and the book is about her struggles. There are tons of mistakes, MISSING MAIN CHARACTERS, and worst of all – the ending completely destroys the entire plot, moral, point, idea, EVERYTHING. The worst part is that people don’t read after they’ve seen the film except in this case the film does NO JUSTICE to the book whatsover. Ugh. I just hate this movie so much. I actually watched this movie once just so that I’d have a fair right to complain about it. In an alternate universe where I had the guts to say what I felt, and I’d also be famous and somehow meet Mr. Cassavetes, I’d come up to him and tell him exactly how awful it is. For now I guess I’ll just stick to internet and real life rants with ALL OF YOU. I mean, if sad cancer kid stories are your thing, by all means go watch them, but they had NO RIGHT SAYING “BASED ON A BOOK BY” BECAUSE THAT IS A DAMN LIE.
- The Time Traveler’s Wife / Audrey Niffenegger, Directed by Robert Schwentke – one of my favorite books of all times. I downloaded it after I finished the book because I was told it was good. Got bored 15 minutes in. It was awful. Rachel McAdams was really bad (and I do like her in other films). It made the story seem… stupid.
- Eragon / Christopher Paolini, Directed by Stefen Fangmeier – the whole Eragon fanbase simply denies the existence of this movie. It’s that bad.
- Inkheart / Cornelia Funke, Directed by Iain Softley – the book was fantastic. Quit the movie in the middle and went to do something else. It was boring as hell.
- Harry Potter / JK Rowling, Directed by 2 Davids and 2 Other People – yes, I’m referring to all of them. I only really sat down to watch these films after I’d read the first six (back when the seventh wasn’t out yet) and I hated them all. I’ve the sixth and both seventh parts in theaters because I like suffering. Seriously. I don’t even know why I went to see them. I knew I’d hate ’em. The fifth was the worst. It was like having my childhood stabbed by a knife and then repeatedly shot over and over for two hours and twenty two minutes. I hated it. When I went to see the last film everyone around me was crying about the ending and I was just full of rage and yet happiness too, because finally NO MORE AWFUL POTTER CHILDHOOD MOVIES WERE GOING TO BE MADE. I consider “the end” of Harry Potter to be July 21st, 2007. The movies don’t count. God, I hate them so much.
- Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events / Lemony Snicket, Directed by Brad Silberling – I saw this movie more than seven years ago and I really don’t remember anything except the fact that it sort of sucked. The only reason to watch this would probably be for the commentary by Daniel Handler, which I’ve heard excerpts of, and because Wikipedia describes it as “In character as Lemony Snicket, he derides the Lemony Snicket in the film – played by Jude Law – as an impostor, as well as choosing to play accordion and sing about leeches rather than pay attention to the film. At numerous times during the track he shows great sympathy towards the Baudelaire children, and implies that he is being held captive by the director in order to do the commentary.”
- The Neverending Story / Michael Ende, Directed by Wolfgang Petersen – I watched the film when I was little and I thought it was the most boring movie I’d ever watched in all of eternity. I read the book not too long ago, maybe a year or two, and was pleasantly surprised to discover that it was actually good.
- The Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer, Directed by Some People and Also a David – again, I’m addressing all of the films (although the third wasn’t as bad). I watched the first back when Twilight was just beginning. I had read the book but my friend and sister hadn’t and they didn’t understand a thing. The second movie is like the worst film ever. The fourth was just lame. The fourth, pt. 2 was HILARIOUS. I think the ending was the funniest thing I’ve ever seen. The whole Alice-dream? My friend and I just sat there laughing through the entire thing. The whole movie was just… a parody of itself. It was pathetic. And freaking funny.
- The Cat in the Hat / Dr. Suess, Directed by Bo Welch– I don’t exactly HATE this one. I was just really freaked out by the Cat. The entire movie was just… scary as hell. That was more of a kid’s nightmare than a kid’s movie.
- My Sister’s Keeper / Jodi Picoult, Directed by Nick Cassavetes – no, this isn’t a mistake. I JUST HATE THIS MOVIE SO MCUH OH GOD IT’S AWFUL I’M SO SORRY JODI DEAR YOUR BABY HAS BEEN MURDERED BRUTALLY FOR MILLIONS OF DOLLARS.
Well, this was fun! I HATE BOOK BASED FILMS. Well, lots of them. There are very good ones too. Maybe I’ll do that some other time. I hope you enjoy this post enough to forgive me for my lack of posts recently.
What do you think of book based films?
Worst ones? Best ones?
Good book, bad movie vs. bad book, good movie?